Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Shari's SlideShow of Daddy
This is an abbreviated version of the wonderful photo show that my youngest sister, Shari, made for Daddy's memorial service. Check it out by clicking here.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Lori's Poem about Daddy
Lori is the poet laureate of the Root Clan. She has created this poem which captures the essence of my dad. If you didn't know him personally, this gives you a real sense of who he was.
He was strong!
Not always so much physically,
But, in every other way possible.
In his mind, in his heart, in his faith,
In his resolve and determination,
And, especially, in his opinions.
He was supportive.
He could always see the pain beneath the exterior.
Give him half a chance,
And he’d be there, at your side,
The moment you felt the world had abandoned you.
He saw your needs and did his best to fill them.
He was funny.
Often, because of his silent world, perhaps,
He didn’t realize the humor in his glance.
A lifted brow, a wondering gaze, a sigh,
and suddenly, the weight of the world
could disappear and you felt your heart grow light.
So alive in every moment.
Tiptoe past in hopes of not being seen,
And you were his.
So aware of every nuance.
A silent smile and lifted brow would signal,
That he was there with you and no words required.
No other songs of praise could ever mean so much
Than those that so rarely, but so very genuinely,
Fell from his lips.
Believing unfailingly that what comes after
Is better than what has been.
Keeping a whole world of sorrow deep within,
And a determination to strive through every
Step and breathe until he was called to his eternal home.
That was the little boy with dreams,
Who became a cowboy in
Who spent his life in devotion to his wife,
And touched those he loved in ways he never
Could have fully realized.
That was our Daddy, our Grandpa, our Santa, our Bob.
Court date set for Porch Boy's Attacker
April 28 I will be presenting my evidence against Aurysia Evans in hopes of winning a verdict that will force her to pay for damages done by her Pit Bull. I sent her a letter offering to settle out of court, but she never even picked up my previous letters. This time I sent one via certified mail and one via regular mail. Maybe she will respond to the one I sent via regular mail. I sure hope so.
I have photos of Porch Boy's injuries, the vet bills, an eye witness' testimony, and Ms. Evans own admission that the dog had escaped the back yard the morning that P Boy was attacked. All of that, plus the fact that the dog had killed another neighbor's poodle, I think gives me the advantage in winning this case.
Am I being vengeful even though she had the Pit Bull put down by the County Animal Control? I don't think so. I am merely asking for her to reimburse the monetary losses I incurred because she did not keep a dangerous animal under control. To me, that's not vengeance. It's justice.
I have photos of Porch Boy's injuries, the vet bills, an eye witness' testimony, and Ms. Evans own admission that the dog had escaped the back yard the morning that P Boy was attacked. All of that, plus the fact that the dog had killed another neighbor's poodle, I think gives me the advantage in winning this case.
Am I being vengeful even though she had the Pit Bull put down by the County Animal Control? I don't think so. I am merely asking for her to reimburse the monetary losses I incurred because she did not keep a dangerous animal under control. To me, that's not vengeance. It's justice.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Plans for My Memorial Service
I've given this a lot of thought since Dad's death. While it was in some ways quite cathartic to put together his memorial service with my siblings, it also was stressful at a time when there was so much emotional upheaval. I want it to be easier for anyone left behind who wants to honor my life. And I actually enjoyed thinking about what kind of service I might want.
Unique. That's a word I've heard all my life in describing me. I think it was used mostly as a compliment, but am aware that it was also used diplomatically by some to avoid the words weird, strange, or other more pejorative terms. I choose to use it in its best context in describing my desires for my ideal memorial service.
The biggest challenge for whoever takes on the responsibility of coordinating will be finding a place that can accommodate my wishes. I envision some sort of homelike atmosphere, but not a furnished home. Nor a corporate hotel/convention type site. Think more along the lines of wherever one would be happy hosting a wedding (Jessica, maybe this would be a snap for you to find, given your professional expertise!)
The main entrance should open on to a big room with a table full of food and drink. People should be encouraged to eat and drink as they visit with one another and share memories of me. Chairs & small tables in a cafe type arrangement should be spread around this big room. In this room should be a book for guests to sign and make comments - loved the one that Denise bought for Dad's so something along those lines would be excellent. The book should be given to Gina.
There should be 4 satellite rooms - preferably adjacent to the big room with the food - with 10-15 chairs set in a circle in each room. Each room should have soft lighting and music. There will be a theme for each room reflecting a different aspect of my life. One person should be designated to stay in each room to greet anyone who enters that room and invite anyone who wants to sit and share to do so. It would be a good idea for whoever is the room facilitator to have an interesting anecdote about me related to the theme of the room. (Spielberg, move over! This is going to be quite a production!)
Room #1: Family Room
In this room there should be lots of photos of me with my family, which would include photos of me with Gina, and photos of me with her family as well. Shari's fantastic photoshow production would be great. I'd like the music in this room to be of me singing. I'll put together a CD mix when I'm at Denise's place this Spring.
Room #2: Pet Room
In this room there should be a laptop playing a continuous loop of all my videos of the dogs & cats. The photos of Plato & Machiavelli that are in my bedroom should be displayed along with all the urns in our entertainment center. If possible, it would be wonderful to let any pets that survive me to be in this room. I'll do a CD mix for this room as well.
Room #3: Academic/Professional Room
In this room there should be a display of my degrees (all at my office) my dissertation, published articles, photos of me in WPG, and anything else from my teaching and County career that would be a good remembrance. Pomp & Circumstance should be softly playing in the background :--)
Room #4: Star Trek Room
Come on. You knew it was going to be there! Lots of paraphernalia in my office to use in this room. Also my Star Trek clothes and a photoshow of the 2007 Cruise & 2008 Convention. I have a CD of Star Trek music to be used here. Not sure who from my family would want to be in this room as facilitator. Maybe Kerry or Brad?
OK. That's what I want. If/when I change my mind I'll let you know. Thanks for indulging me!
Unique. That's a word I've heard all my life in describing me. I think it was used mostly as a compliment, but am aware that it was also used diplomatically by some to avoid the words weird, strange, or other more pejorative terms. I choose to use it in its best context in describing my desires for my ideal memorial service.
The biggest challenge for whoever takes on the responsibility of coordinating will be finding a place that can accommodate my wishes. I envision some sort of homelike atmosphere, but not a furnished home. Nor a corporate hotel/convention type site. Think more along the lines of wherever one would be happy hosting a wedding (Jessica, maybe this would be a snap for you to find, given your professional expertise!)
The main entrance should open on to a big room with a table full of food and drink. People should be encouraged to eat and drink as they visit with one another and share memories of me. Chairs & small tables in a cafe type arrangement should be spread around this big room. In this room should be a book for guests to sign and make comments - loved the one that Denise bought for Dad's so something along those lines would be excellent. The book should be given to Gina.
There should be 4 satellite rooms - preferably adjacent to the big room with the food - with 10-15 chairs set in a circle in each room. Each room should have soft lighting and music. There will be a theme for each room reflecting a different aspect of my life. One person should be designated to stay in each room to greet anyone who enters that room and invite anyone who wants to sit and share to do so. It would be a good idea for whoever is the room facilitator to have an interesting anecdote about me related to the theme of the room. (Spielberg, move over! This is going to be quite a production!)
Room #1: Family Room
In this room there should be lots of photos of me with my family, which would include photos of me with Gina, and photos of me with her family as well. Shari's fantastic photoshow production would be great. I'd like the music in this room to be of me singing. I'll put together a CD mix when I'm at Denise's place this Spring.
Room #2: Pet Room
In this room there should be a laptop playing a continuous loop of all my videos of the dogs & cats. The photos of Plato & Machiavelli that are in my bedroom should be displayed along with all the urns in our entertainment center. If possible, it would be wonderful to let any pets that survive me to be in this room. I'll do a CD mix for this room as well.
Room #3: Academic/Professional Room
In this room there should be a display of my degrees (all at my office) my dissertation, published articles, photos of me in WPG, and anything else from my teaching and County career that would be a good remembrance. Pomp & Circumstance should be softly playing in the background :--)
Room #4: Star Trek Room
Come on. You knew it was going to be there! Lots of paraphernalia in my office to use in this room. Also my Star Trek clothes and a photoshow of the 2007 Cruise & 2008 Convention. I have a CD of Star Trek music to be used here. Not sure who from my family would want to be in this room as facilitator. Maybe Kerry or Brad?
OK. That's what I want. If/when I change my mind I'll let you know. Thanks for indulging me!
Friday, February 6, 2009
2009 is far from fine...so far...
First a recap of 2008, which did have its challenges:
- Dad was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and began chemotherapy treatment
- Gina had a life-threatening Pulmonary Embolism and continues to need Coumodin
- I was diagnosed with diabetes -- so far managed well by medicine & diet change
- Hurricane Ike
- Accident in Gina's new Hyundai Santa Fe caused by a driver with no license nor insurance
- Porch Boy attacked by Pit Bull
But 2008 also had some wonderful high points:
- Fun birthday celebrations - mine in Vegas and Gina's in a cabin out in the woods
- Awesome vacation to Bryce Canyon (even if the hike did almost kill me!) and Zion Canyon
- Fabulous Star Trek Convention with my friends
- Gina & I both bought new vehicles - hers, the aformentioned Sante Fe & mine the MiniCoop
Most of those challenges happened in the last few months of 2008, leading me to believe that 2009 HAD to be better. Well....not so much...at least so far...
On January 5, Dad's negative reaction to the new chemotherapy and subsequent hospitalization, quickly resulting in his death on January 17, was shocking and the grief process is painful. My niece, Alena, got laid off at work and is 8 months pregnant! Then, on January 27 we arrived home after work to find Porch Boy in shock and had to rush him to the vet. My immediate thought was that this had to be related to the Pit Bull attack, but it wasn't. Seems he ate something that didn't agree with him (probably one of the cat's hairball pukes) and it took him several hours before he could vomit it up. The next day I came down with what was diagnosed as "acute bronchitis" and have just regained my voice today.
And yesterday, February 5, we were rear-ended by a Ford F150 truck while on the way to work in the Hyundai Santa Fe AGAIN! Two wrecks and we've only had that SUV since April 2008!!! Gina was injured (her back) so I drove her to the St. Luke's Urgent Care center. They ran some tests because of her PE problem to make sure that she wasn't bleeding internally and gave her some pain killer/muscle relaxant to ease her pain. Fortunately, the at-fault driver this time was both licensed and insured. Gina stayed home yesterday & today and will return to work on Monday. I just took off yesterday in order to deal with getting the SUV to the collision center and to get a rental for Gina since she can't drive the stick-shift transmission on Chili Pepper (my aforementioned MiniCooper).
We're planning to give Alena a baby shower on February 22, and hopefully it will be one of the highlights for 2009. Sure hope I have better news to report for the rest of the year, because quite honestly...2009 SUCKS BIG TIME SO FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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